Wednesday, May 9, 2018

12 years

I don’t even know how to begin to write a blog post about someone I love so fiercely, but drives me to the brink of insanity.

Because I do love him fiercely. I almost chose not to have a second child. I was scared. I was anxious. I was a little bit crazy. But I’m so glad I made the decision. Because without Kyle, my life would be so empty. He shows me what life is about. The ups, the downs, the calm, the crazy. He does them all for me. 

We might be way too much alike and that’s why he drives me insane. He pushes my buttons daily. He sighs at me. He rolls his eyes at me. He only hears what he wants to. He’s a slob. He’s unorganized. But we’re working on all of that. And sometimes it’s better. And sometimes he’s a hot mess. But it’s all typical. And I didn’t know what that was like until he came along. 

When Michael is at work, it’s him & I that form a team for David. It’s me changing the diaper. It’s him running to get me the wipes or a plastic bag. It’s me feeding David & him getting the water I forgot in the kitchen. It’s me carrying David to the van. It’s him opening the door & getting the diaper bag. 

Kyle branched out this year to do track for the first year. He was one of the smallest kids out there. He worked hard & learned a lot. He was exhausted. But happy. He wasn’t the best. But improved. And I missed him a lot when he wasn’t home. I realized how much he really DOES help me when he’s with me. But spreading those wings now is what part of growing up is about. And I hope we continue to show him how to do that. 

Our life is messy, lovely, gross, and funny. It’s also weird, but normal. It’s a lot to take in. But Kyle has embraced it & doesn’t know anything different. Nor do I think he wishes for anything different. We’re just who we are. And he knows that’s who we are. 

Happy 12th Birthday Kyle. I’m very lucky to have you & so happy that you drive me so crazy. 

Love you lots. 

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